Hard times come to all of us, and this morning at 5:00 am -5 gmt has started one of the hardest days of my life.

My choices that I make today will cement my path for all my tomorrows to come. The man I am suppose to marry....that I was suppose to marry on Feb 27 2009 is struggling once again with the same demons that haunt his past. I don't feel that I can be specific on the internet so I will refer to these problems as demons. For they affect him and our lives as negatively as any evil force with out the ease of being banished by simple cleansing and chanting verses.

He is now with those that may be able to help him but these demons he has chosen to succumb to affect all of us. I am a woman with two children, one possibly on the way. So I am not the only one who will inherent my decisions. Humans have one of the greatest abilities. That is choice.

He chose to fall to his past demons and allow them to consume him and he partook in them. He then turned around and tried to reject them, he can not reject them on his own and has sought help. The question is this; do I allow him a chance of redemption, a chance to know his kids as they grow up, a chance to become a better person with us? Or do I turn my back on him and leave him to deal with his demonic problems alone?

I have known this man for four years of my life. During this time I have seen him fall. I have also seen him rise. I have seen a man with great potential. I have seen a man who has yet to resolve past problems. I have seen a great Father.

I have seen first hand the struggle of good vs evil and the will to overcome. I have seen weakness and fear. I have seen power and strength. I have seen gentleness and kindness. I have seen a man as he is and he he can choose to become.

Choice is a powerful thing. Choice is the medium on which we balance between that which is good and that which is evil. Even after committing an evil act a human can redeem themselves and choose good. Just as a man who chooses good can fall down to a choice of evil.

Is the inner struggle of good and evil worth having a complete family? Is it worth taking the risk to see a man fall to knees from his own inner weakness? Is it worth allowing the kids be near such a man with weaknesses that affect us like they do? Is the good of a man worth helping him with his evil?

A man who seeks that which is good but does not have to strength to combat his weakness.Does allowing your weakness to overcome you make you evil? Does it mean that you are a monster for not having the moral character to say NO? Can you find the strength when your knees are giddy and stomach clenching and mouth watering to look at someone and tell them to stop? He will have to find a way to do just that if he wants to conquer himself.

The hardest battle that you wage is the battle of your self.